POSTED 2/11/14


SHADOW WARRIOR

Devolver Digital

Jonathan ‘Wossy’ Ross auditions to play The Addams Family’s Lurch: “You Wang?”

Yes you are! Now if you think that’s just a really shit joke that should die in a fire you’d be right. You also won’t enjoy Shadow Warrior.

A remaster of a classic FPS from a time when the pixels were blocky and the protagonists weren’t nervous, in Shadow Warrior you ARE Wang. Lo Wang. He’s sent on a quest by his boss to obtain a rare and mystical sword by fair means or, if necessary, foul. He may have the touch, he may have the power, but Wang finds the gig somewhat of a challenge when assailed by all manner of well-armed hired goons.

Still, he does have Hoji. He’s a sort of demonic spirit guide who seems to have absorbed a few too many Christian Slater movies. He’s kind of helpful when not getting on your tits, for you’ll be dealing with all manner of Shadow Realm inhabitants that are all horny and deadly. When we say “dealing” we mean gunning guns and slashing with your katana. After all, there’s nothing like having a satisfying slash, right?

It’s all quite linear, save for the odd off the beaten track secret to find. But there’s also a certain comfiness in going trad and seeing OTT PCness hurled out the window. We’re not talking nerd rock bands chucking computers from hotels, either.

While somewhat spit and polished, Shadow Warrior’s roots still show, as while hardly an exercise in Duplo emulation, it’s also not graphically 2014. Nor is gameplay, but if you miss big dumb humour and those gamey Serious Duke Doominess times of the era that also gave us everything from Britpop to the Spice Girls then you’ll be in Nirvana.

After all, they kind of need a new singer...

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