review
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POSTED 8/8/13


FLOATING CLOUD GOD SAVES THE PILGRIMS IN HD!

Dakko Dakko

Vita/PSN

Boo-doo bum-bum-bum, ba-dum-bum bum-ba dum...

Love, love, love. Love, love, love.

...and another one’s gone, and another one’s gone.

Love, love, love, love...

Another one bites the dust!

Love, love, love...

One simple mash-up, one game reviewed. Yeah, pub time!

What? You need more on top of that and the delightfully descriptive title? Oh, alright.

FCGSTPIH! is a retro-slanted horizontal scrolling shooteristic affair vaguely reminiscent of Defender, in which you, the titular cloud god, look after the also titular pilgrims. In HD, natch. With an exclamation mark!

These aren’t pilgrims in your classic John-Wayne-is-big-leggy western sense though, more in a Flying Tigers meets The Barbarian and the Geisha. Just without the tigers, the barbarian and the geisha, but with beautiful Japaneseyness and, well, lotsa flying.

So, you shoot baddies trying to thwart our pilgrims’ progress. This amounts to an array of batshit-bonkers sprites that the likes of Parodius or Fantasy Zone would be chuffed to call their kin. Said pilgrims trundle along undaunted beneath you, save for the odd hat rescue, as you not only take out their adversaries, but also absorb bullets so as they don’t get dead. In return, they give you love, love, love, which gives you more power if used wisely. Firing relentlessly isn’t necessarily the best strategy here. But! Buttity-buttity-but-but-but! Let them get hit and they’re goners. Lose them all before level’s end and it’s restart city, population you.

Seven levels divided into various stages, each with creatively creative boss fights with an eye to classic shmups ensue. As is tradition, it gets rather fucking challenging as things progress, but not stupidly impossible.

Balance is good, but the game’s short. Still, it’s hardly expensive, you schnorer-pants, you! Plus if you’re feeling blah you get pilgrims declaring their love, love, love. Which is, of course, all you need...

Hey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-a-yeah!

take me back to the start...

 



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ALL WRITTEN CONTENT COPYRIGHT © AMY FLOWER 2008-2018. GAME IMAGES COURTESY OF RESPECTIVE GAMES COMPANIES.